Do you recognize the face of leadership anger? Do you see it coming, before it causes problems?
Typically referred to as a secondary emotion, anger is almost always preceded by fear. Your fear is generated in the part of the brain called the amygdala–a more primitive part of the brain. When stimulated, it calls the body into fight or flight mode–actions which, during cavemen times, had huge survival benefits. But such responses can be instantaneous and destructive, especially for leaders.
Each time anger raises its ugly head, make a point to identify the source. For example, notice when you are experiencing a feeling in your body. Label the feeling. “This is adrenaline.” “This is agitation.” “This is fear.” Allow the feeling to occur, without blocking it. This is critical. Name the feeling, without making it personal (i.e. “I am afraid”).
Notice the affects anger has on your body, during and after the experience. Anger that isn’t resolved can cause resentment, anxiety, bitterness, depression, stress, fatigue, health issues or a general coldness to people. All of these are detrimental to your productivity and leadership.
Your relationships are damaged by the way anger changes you. It also effects everyone else in a negative way. People try to avoid angry coworkers, which strains communication and collaboration. Work is challenging enough without walls between people. Employees wondering when the next outburst will come from their leader will take no risks, make no extra efforts or be willing to make decisions. They will play it safe and avoid any wrath they can.
With a staff leery of their leader’s mood, the productivity of the team suffers. People are not engaged with their work. Some of them will look for other jobs, creating a turnover problem. When an anger-prone leader drives people away, everyone notices, including higher executives.
Thoughtful reflection is helpful in recognizing any of these trends. Comparing your responses today to those of the past may shed light on the transformation. Be honest with yourself. The first step to improve is to see the need. Get feedback from a trusted colleague or family member (click here to read my blog tips on Receiving Feedback). Your anger issue is certainly noticed. Be an accepting listener and make it a safe conversation for all participants.
What do you think? Do you recognize the face of leadership anger, before it causes problems? I’d love to hear from you. You can call me at 561-582-6060, let’s talk. And as always, I can be reached here or on LinkedIn.
